Turkey Day

I know it is totally niave of me to think (perhaps even totally ridiculous!) that you have all been waiting and waiting for a new post from me. I am like the boy that hasn't called you back since......hmmm...haven't posted since September. It would appear that I am just not that into you.

But appearance are deceiving internet! I have been thinking about you alot! So today I said, "Dear Life, I don't care how you are busy with other things. I am going to write a blog on my lunch break whether you like it or not. Love, ME."

So, Thanksgiving.

My story begins about 2 weeks ago. When I realized, "Hey, I am cooking my very first Thanksgiving all by myself for like 6 whole people this year. I should probably get on buying a turkey." Translation: Husband, go pick out a turkey while I shop for other fun things because I am avoiding the fact that I HAVE TO COOK THANKSGIVING DINNER THIS YEAR. Result: 21lbs turkey, curtosey my husband's ability to shop with his eyes and stomach only. GIANT.

Fast forward to the Sunday before Thanksgiving. Oh hey, big giant turkey. I should probably start thawing you out now because you are ONLY 21lbs and I probably should have started a week ago.

Fast forward to Tuesday morning. Oh hey, big giant turkey. WHY ARE YOU DEFROSTED ALREADY? ISN'T THAT SUPPOSED TO TAKE FOREVER! Oh yea, and thanks for the turkey blood all over my fridge. Lucky for you I didn't have anything important on that shelf. I will get you back...just wait until THURSDAY.



So Thanksgiving finally roles around. I have been terrified all week mind you. Conjuring up plan B, C, and D because the turkey defrosted too early and therefore DINNER WAS RUINED.

But thanks it large part to Mrs. AMAZING MEYERS dinner went off without a hitch. Better than that....it was delightful, moist, carby dinner yummyness. And Mrs. AMAZING MEYERS did pretty much everything. Turkey - delicious thanks to her stuffing knowledge. Cannied yams - amazing thanks to her knowledge of ol' family recipes (BUTTER). Cranberry Sauce-unreal thanks to her knowledge of knowing how to make freakin cranberry sauce. From SCRATCH (that means our cranberry sauce did NOT look like the can it came out of! Cause it didn't come out of a can!). I am all kinds of jealous of her knowledge, but greatful I did not have to resort to plan B, C or D (Hello Boston Market? Is it too late to order a whole dinner 3pm on Thanksgiving day?).

                                                   

But! I did accomplish something myself!

It is called Turtle Pumpkin Pie. Aka cheaters pumpkin pie because there is no baking involved!

All you need:

Pre-made graham cracker crust

Vanilla instant jello pudding

Pre-made pumpkin puree

CARMAL SAUCE....nom nom nom

A little of this and a little of that (cause a gourmet chef NEVER gives away her secrets ...hehe)

and INSTANT PIE

So all in all : Thanksgiving just got OWNED. Housewife adventures style.

Sale Rack Woes

Target. "Tar Zeah". I love you, I do but I am still not sure how I feel about my most recent jaunt through your bountiful sale racks that always call my name. Let me tell you why you have upset me Target Sale Racks:

1) I found this great skirt. Black, pencil, stretchy! Stretchy= comfortable! A comfortable work skirt ON SALE...eeeeeekkk!

So this skirt, it also has these cool bike shorty meshy shorts underneath. Kinda of fun, a little weird.

I was going to be fine with this weird addition to my $5.00 skirt, however, weird meshy shorts = swishy noises when my thighs rub together! UGH. I only discovered this at work when I wore my fun new $5.00 SKIRT! and it started making noise while I was walking. I walked like a duck for the rest of the day to avoid the musical noise my thighs make when they rub together. Thanks for the reminder Target. Love ya.

2) This might be the most depressing story you have ever heard. I found this FABULOUS lil dress. I can wear it to work, I can wear it casual. IT IS MULTI-FUNCTIONAL $15.00 amazingness.

It is adorable. It is flattering scoopneck wonderfulness. It is loose flirty sleeves. It HAS POCKETS. I hugged it and squeezed it and brought it home with me. Then I saw this:

Incase you are wondering. Kelsey is NOT preggers. So this. This = HORRIFIED KELSEY. I haven't brought myself to take the tag off. I don't know what to do with it. Cause guys! It is sooo cute on me! But! I am not pregnant...it shouldn't be! AARG. 

So Target. You are not my favorite person right now. 

In other news, if you have ever wondered what would happen if you have a full open box of rice in your hands and something falls on the floor and you bend over to pick it up. Don't worry, I have got you covered:

Now you know.